For the Anxious Heart

My anxiety has been plaguing me these days. Some days are harder than others, obviously. But lately, I’ve been having the REALLY hard days. I’ve been having those days where I don’t even want to get out of bed for fear of having a panic attack. Or those days where I’m sitting at church with my girls and I can feel the anxiety stalking me out like a vulture to a carcass. And I had a thought the other day, admittedly a dark thought: Why doesn’t God take this away from me?

I remember days where I would beg God to make it stop. I mean, in the middle of an anxiety attack, BEGGING God to stop it, begging God to take this pain away. And He never has. Honestly, it’s frustrating. I mean if He’s God and Almighty and Sovereign, He surely can stop me from being anxious and having anxious thoughts, right?

“…I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud. Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, ‘My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.’ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-9 NLT)
I can hear Him now: “My grace is all you need.” God is going to do something with my anxiety that will bring Him glory. Weird, right? And I don’t see it as being His guinea pig, but rather His vessel. He is using my weakness to demonstrate His power.
Do I still wish He would stop my anxiety? Absolutely! It sucks! But, I also know that I am on this earth to be His vessel. Just as Paul begged, and just as I begged, and just as you are probably begging, maybe God won’t make it stop. Because He wants us to know that His grace is all we need.
Be encouraged. This isn’t the end. He is causing everything to work together for your God. If you think about it, He’s the one that made you in the first place. Trust that He knows what He’s doing!
xoxo, Ticia
“For we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose for them.” (Romans 8:28 NLT)
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